Thomas Michael O’Brien was born July 6, 1958, in Lynn, MA. He was gently called home by our Lord on January 26, 2025, surrounded by love and family at Community Hospice House in Merrimack.
Tom lived in Billerica and Tewksbury, MA, and moved to Nashua, NH in 1994 to start our life together. He quickly fell in love with Hollis where we spent much of our outdoor time.
Tom graduated from Billerica Memorial High in 1976 and attended Middlesex Community College.
Tom fought a courageous battle with an aggressive metastatic colon cancer. He was so blessed to have spent his final days in such a peaceful, nurturing home where he was offered music therapy, dog therapy and tasty home-cooked comfort food. He had a beautiful, forested view through wide and tall windows and had a five-star private room.
Tom fought like a grizzly bear to battle the monster, but it took a firm hold and never let go. It was a battle no one could have won. While cancer stole his body, dignity, ability to walk, voice, ability to enjoy food and drink and independence, it did not take his sense of humor, kindness, love of family and friends, courage, faith in God or zest for life. He never once asked “Why me?” or showed any anger toward God. His caregivers all loved him for his fighting spirit and his cheerful attitude, even in spite of the excruciating pain he endured. One LNA remarked to him “Tom, you look so cute” (in his bright yellow) shirt. He remarked, with the quietest of voices, “I’m ADORABLE”. It was nice to have a moment of laughter. As his soulmate, I never stopped trying to save him. I went to most every medical appointment. I read every doctor note and article I could find. I managed appointments and so much medication. I oversaw as many procedures as I could. I yelled; I screamed for better care when needed. I was his voice when his was gone. I strongly advocated for him among medical professionals. I spent endless quiet hours by his bedside, as did his childhood friend, Jim Lavoie. When Tom asked me to “stay overnight”, that was my first indication that his journey to Heaven had begun in earnest. Tom also had the strong support of a loving extended family (and their cheerful dogs) which surely lifted everyone’s spirits.
Tom loved working as a Composite Technician at BAE Systems, Merrimack, NH, where he received many special awards. He worked extremely hard but still had fun working with his team. Even after Tom had received a terminal diagnosis, he still hoped to return to work. He rarely missed work except for illness. We had hoped to retire to a warmer climate.
Tom enjoyed travelling to Vegas, Hawaii, Northeast Kingdom, Vermont, Colorado, Texas, Maine, Star Island and Nashville. He had always hoped to get back to his “Mother” land – Hawaii. He was not a fan of winter but would willingly trudge through the new fallen snow to track wild animals, take the dogs out, or care for the horses, all to be by my side.
Tom loved rock music (Murder Dolls, Alice in Chains, and Rolling Stones). However, he reluctantly at first, accompanied me to Chris Young and Kane Brown concerts and made the best of it. He and I met Chris several times and Tom always talked football with him. We travelled to many states to see Chris Young. He did this for me. In fact, I was injured at CMA Fest and he had to cart me around in a wheelchair in 90-degree humid heat. That is love. Tom even attended one concert with a broken rib and was getting tossed about and in a lot of pain…for me.
Our favorite television shows were Game of Thrones, Sopranos, Tulsa, Sons of Anarchy, Dexter and our #1 Friends. We had a game to guess what the next line of Friends would be. We also loved playing Jeopardy. We loved horror movies, comedies, true crime, travel show, HGTV, history and documentaries.
We loved just hanging with the horses. They brought us peace, hope and serenity. He loved to see me with horses because it made me so happy. Even when he could barely walk, he wanted me to set him up in the pasture so he could watch me groom them as he was too weak to do so. His favorite horse is a beautiful chestnut named JJ. He enjoyed helping me groom and caring for horses over the years-having no fear of them because he trusted I would never put him in harm’s way. He watched me ride for hours and helped get the horses ready for me. He even rode once or twice. When a horse took off on him after being spooked, somehow he managed to stay on. He was not a dog trainer when we first met, but I surely turned him into a knowledgeable, compassionate trainer. Tom was my cheerleader at many dog competitions with our beloved Borita. He helped care for and train hundreds of dogs through the years, saving many lives that may have been lost. He volunteered to do kennel duty and walk as many dogs as he could. We had made several trips to save baby squirrels, baby birds, bunnies, etc. He would always stop for turtles and get them to safety. Tom came to know that if I wanted to stop to make sure an animal in the road was actually dead, there was no sense in arguing with me. Tom was great at catching dogs that were in harm’s way. He had no fear, which is one reason even the toughest animals took to him. Tom was part of the protest against Michael Vick and spoke in front of various committees to save wildlife habitat. He was in a documentary about saving New Hampshire’s bobcats from trapping. He helped fight against puppy mills. Tom was dedicated to animal rescue and advocacy, especially for Rottweilers and bully breeds. He volunteered for Paisley’s Place, a non-profit that saves equines from slaughter. These equines were huge and nervous around new people, but Tom instantly became a part of their herd.
We loved spending time at Greeley Park, Bensons, Beaver Brook and Monson Center. We enjoyed peaceful drives in Hollis and Temple to spot deer, coyote, fox or bobcat. We have had several sightings of Moose when we travelled up north, as well as many black bear. We used to drive for hours listening to Dean Koontz and Stephen King audio books. I was his ride or die, always.
He cherished family time every Sunday to watch football and eat home cooked food. His favorite food was eggplant parmigiana made by his sister, Julie and shepherd’s pie from his other sister, Tracey. He was thrilled to have been able to attend two Patriots Superbowl Parades, games and practices during TB12 glory days! We both stood out in large crowds, 100-degree weather shoulder-to-shoulder just to get a glimpse of the great ones doing their thing. Even with today’s current team, Tom never gave up on them. I remember one night though it looked like the Pats would lose the Superbowl against the Eagles and Tom finally went to bed. Then Tom Brady got the ball and, I screamed “Get up Tom, Brady’s got the ball with a minute to go!” Tom got to try on Super Bowl ring replicas at the Patriots experience and stand next to a statue of the team. We had so much fun at Gillette stadium. He loved to talk football with his brother, Corey, and his friend Dennis Brodeur.
He was happy to see that Trump had won!
Tom taught Kung-Fu and women’s self-defense courses at Michael Macaris Kung- Fu Academy in Billerica, MA for many years. He also competed in Martial Arts as a 2nd degree black belt.
Tom had a big, courageous heart. He once intervened at a Boston park when a gang of people were attacking a park goer. He was able to get the person to safety but the police thought Tom was the one that beat up the man at first so he was handcuffed. Another time, Tom pulled a person out of rolled over car that was leaking gasoline. He was kind and I know that he will have a good seat at the Lord’s table because of it.
Recently baptized, Tom was a communicant of Immaculate Conception Church. We prayed faithfully and asked for a miracle or at least comfort from the pain and mental anguish. While we were not honored with a miracle to save his life, instead we were blessed to have him pass in a wonderful home setting surrounded by those he loved the most. THAT was the miracle. Though our hearts will always have a piece missing, it was not right for any of us to ask him to stay. He had to go because his suffering was beyond measure. Ironically, Tom woke up with eyes wide as he was receiving prayer from an Immaculate Conception Church volunteer, his heart slowly beat for the last time. I ran over to him and he was still breathing with his eyes half open. I comforted him and was grateful for those last seconds as we looked into each other’s eyes for the last time in the 30 beautiful years we shared. I only hoped he would see me and hear me as I laid one final kiss on him. Shortly after, the winter sun came through the window surrounding Tom’s face in love and welcoming warmth. So, I was wrong. We did actually get that miracle because we saw his suffering end and saw him being welcomed by Angels and loved ones that were waiting for him. He had a smile and peaceful look of relief upon his face. His grimace of pain was no more.
Tom was predeceased by his loving father, Allen Thain. Survivors include his longtime “lobster” and soulmate, Denise Muccioli, Mother Patricia Thain (DeCecca), Sisters: Julie Ramalho and husband Arthur Ramalho, Jr., Tracey Greenwood and husband Joseph Greenwood, Rhonda Thain-Sweet and boyfriend William Paskiewicz, Brother Corey Thain and wife Jessica Thain, dear friends James Lavoie, Laurie Lavoie, Diane Muccioli, Paula Ledoux, Cousins Rick Jones and Kim Tobey, many nieces and nephews and “his” beloved dog, Luna.
In lieu of flowers, donations would be appreciated: Paisley’s Place and the Home of the Unadoptables, 148 Pulpit Road, Bedford, NH, 03110. PayPal: @unadoptables
Calling hours will be held at the FARWELL FUNERAL HOME, 18 Lock Street, Nashua, on Sunday afternoon, February 2nd from 3 to 5 p.m. His Funeral Mass will be celebrated on Monday, February 3rd at 10 a.m. in Immaculate Conception Church, 216 East Dunstable Road, followed by burial at Woodlawn Cemetery, both in Nashua. To leave an online message of condolence, please visit www.farwellfuneralservice.com
